Observer-Reporter forum

amom · Posted: Thu Dec 03, 2009 11:48 pm Post subject: I Hope Not to Offend

and I imagine none of you are in this shape (or non-shape), but this is sad:
http://www.nydailynews.com/travel/2009/12/03/2009-12-03_too_fat_to_fly_photo_showing_overweight_passenger_raises_questions_of_airline_sa.html
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Brant · Posted: Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:03 am Post subject:

Thanks, Amom. That guy makes me look skinny. I feel better about myself. Laughing

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ellipses · Mod Joined: 29 Sep 2008 Posts: 9218 Location: WashPa!

He's skin and bones!

Dinosaur bones...
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Cylinsier · Master Joined: 29 Sep 2008 Posts: 13229 Location: Oh shi-

I don't like to hate because some people have thyroid problems or whatever, but really? Be a little considerate and at least buy two seats.
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Brant · Posted: Fri Dec 04, 2009 8:46 am Post subject:

There was a comedian whose name I can't recall who said someone once told him that a girl was "big-boned," and he replied, "There's a lot of big meat hanging off those big bones."
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The priests of the different religious sects dread the advance of science as witches do the approach of daylight.

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OndinitaAKALibchit · Posted: Fri Dec 04, 2009 10:11 am Post subject:

Lol@ Brant!

I agree with Cy...I don't like to make fun of people like that bc you never know what kind of health problems he may have, but he really should've purchased two seats...

This pic is kinda inappropriate, so I'm not embedding it, but I look at this pic whenever I feel like my butt is too big and it makes me feel better:

http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/azer8118/bigButt.jpg
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ellipses · Mod Joined: 29 Sep 2008 Posts: 9218 Location: WashPa!

Bazaaaaam! Holy jeez that has to be fake
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Cylinsier · Master Joined: 29 Sep 2008 Posts: 13229 Location: Oh shi-

I cried.
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ellipses · Mod Joined: 29 Sep 2008 Posts: 9218 Location: WashPa!

She's part centaur, I am positive.
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OndinitaAKALibchit · Posted: Fri Dec 04, 2009 10:23 am Post subject:

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"If by a 'Liberal' they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people — their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights and their civil liberties ... if that is what they mean by a 'Liberal,' then I’m proud to say I’m a 'Liberal.'" ~ Senator John F. Kennedy 9/14/1960

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dick · Journeyman Joined: 28 Jan 2009 Posts: 3134

The fat guy's head is at least a foot higher than anyone else on the plane. He's either 6'10", sitting on the arm rest, sitting on his own back fat, or the photo was doctored.
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busdriver · Journeyman Joined: 16 Mar 2009 Posts: 3497

[quote="OndinitaAKALibchit"]Lol@ Brant!

I agree with Cy...I don't like to make fun of people like that bc you never know what kind of health problems he may have, but he really should've purchased two seats...

This pic is kinda inappropriate, so I'm not embedding it, but I look at this pic whenever I feel like my butt is too big and it makes me feel better:

Damn, phoney, how much turkey did your neighbor eat Thanksgiving day

http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/azer8118/bigButt.jpg

OndinitaAKALibchit · Posted: Fri Dec 04, 2009 5:07 pm Post subject:

LOL @ Bus!!!
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"If by a 'Liberal' they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people — their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights and their civil liberties ... if that is what they mean by a 'Liberal,' then I’m proud to say I’m a 'Liberal.'" ~ Senator John F. Kennedy 9/14/1960

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busdriver · Journeyman Joined: 16 Mar 2009 Posts: 3497

Company Memo

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

DATE: October 1, 2008

RE: Gala Christmas Party

I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM. Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees!

Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!

Merry Christmas to you and your family,

Patty

Company Memo

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

DATE: October 2, 2008

RE: Gala Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on, we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.

Happy now?

Happy Holidays to you and your family,

Patty

Company Memo

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All Employees

DATE: October 3, 2008

RE: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, you didn't sign your name. I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this?

Somebody?

And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy.

REMEMBER: NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED..

Company Memo

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

To: All Employees

DATE: October 4, 2008

RE: Generic Holiday Party

What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy. Will that work?

Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms.

Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each group will have their own table.

Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table.

To the person asking permission to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing be allowed, apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms. Sorry.

We will have booster seats for short people.

Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.

I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food . The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first.

There will be fresh "low sugar" fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "no sugar" desserts. Sorry!

Did I miss anything?!?!?

Patty

Company Memo

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director

TO: All F*%^ing Employees

DATE: October 5, 2008

RE: The F*%^ing Holiday Party

I've had it with you vegetarian pricks!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your f*%^ing salad bar, including organic tomatoes. But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too.. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!

The rest of you f*%^ing wierdos can kiss my *ss. I hope you all have a rotten holiday!

Drive drunk and die,

The B*tch from H*ll!!!

Company Memo

FROM: Joan Bishop, Acting Human Resources Director

DATE: October 6, 2008

RE: Patty Lewis and Holiday Party

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Patty Lewis a speedy recovery and I'll continue to forward your cards to her.

In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.

Happy Holidays!

Joan

Brant · Posted: Sat Dec 05, 2009 5:57 pm Post subject:

That says about all you can say about political correctness. Laughing

_________________

The priests of the different religious sects dread the advance of science as witches do the approach of daylight.

- Thomas Jefferson